A place to share struggles and triumphs, a place to bless and serve - but never a place to murmur or complain. 

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Two Thousand and Nine is coming!

I'm excited for the New Year. Not for parties, because the only party I'm invited to will end before I can get there after work. For me, this year it is mostly about beginning again. I've come through a lot in the last few years and this moment in time feels like having reached a mountaintop. I recognize how far I've come from where I used to be - and the road ahead gets clearer each day. I have placed my hand in the Lord's, and he is guiding me. I have a lot of work ahead of me, no matter what I choose, but in honesty life is good and I am looking forward to it. I must be smart, and make good choices for my family. I will be faithful and strong, because that is the road to happiness. I will be loving and compassionate, because that is the road to peace.
This year is about a few things. Finding a career and some stability for my family. A "job" just can't do that. Second, bringing the Savior more to my children. Third, my health - I want to be stronger physically. 
The Career will come. I will continue to put my faith and trust in the Lord. He will take me where He wants me to go. Trust is a big word here, but it is good.
For me, leading my children to do the simple things - reading the scriptures, and having family prayer - is the hardest. They give me so much opposition, it brings me to tears - literally. My desire is to teach them the gospel, help them to build a strong foundation of their own for the times in their lives when they must rely on the Lord. If it brings me to tears of frustration every day, I will still keep trying. I will give myself credit for the trying and I will not give up. It is too important. Some days are better than others. I have learned that creativity is the way to my goal. If I can't get them all to sit still in the living room, I can get them to come to the computer - so, some days we read online. Sometimes we pray at the beside of the one who has to get to bed first. Sometimes we pray at the dinner table. I have to be scrappy and quick. We have Family Home Evening when I have a night off. In a family where the schedule changes weekly, it's not about a specific evening - it's about what works. I am the only one who can do this for my children and I have to think on my feet. It's too important. I will give myself credit for trying, even and maybe especially when they ignore and oppose me. I will not quit.
Looking out for my health is a natural outgrowth of needing to release the tension in my body. Yoga, Dance, Walking - whatever it is that I feel like doing. I need to take care of myself. It is a way to be loving with myself, to show myself that I appreciate what is happening in my life. Yoga is especially loving. It just feels so GOOD to stretch - and it can elevate my heart rate as well as any low-impact aerobics, maybe better. I realized a long time ago, that my body doesn't like very strenuous exercise - it needs a lot of slow methodic motion. I think that's why my job has been good for my physically. I'm constantly on the move. A career that keeps me moving would probably be wise, as well. Adding in a little more exercise in the mornings is just another way to say, "I like you! Let's make you feel better today!" It's SO not about looking a certain way, or being "thinner" - I just want to be strong and healthy. That is what feels good to me.
So, I'm looking forward to this year. Let's GO!


Melinda said...


I just want to say, way to go. Don't give up. I look back now and wish I hadn't given in to the pleas of "do we have to". sometimes it just felt like too much work, and no reward. I promise you, the reward is there, you just may not see it right away. So I want to encourage you to be strong, and continue to be flexible just don't give up. Happy New Year.

Allison said...

What a wonderful way to think of exercise, as a way of appreciating the body we have....the act that says, "I like you". Genius! Thank you for that insight.